Golden Assistant 37

 

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If you're reading this anywhere else, it has been stolen from https://daisyktranslations.blogspot.com/

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Enjoy Chapter 37! 

Chapter 37

"Don't cry for Argentina——"[1] As soon as Xiao Yi started singing, the audience was momentarily shocked. His voice was deep and resounding, and the chorus of the song he picked, when compared to the original classic female voice, Xiao Yi's male voice sang without difficulty. He brought a completely different feeling from Madonna. His voice was sad, heavy, and desolate, showing off his skills and brought genuinity.

After hearing this first line, Wang Jing tapped the button, turned around, and cheered loudly. 

"The truth I never left you....." Xiao Yi sang, with a low tremor in his voice, he closed his eyes, "All through wild days....." 

His voice went lower when he sang: "I love you and hope you love me.....". With one sentence: "Yeah......", he slowly faded out. The audience applauded, but the music was not over yet, and another piece of music started immediately. The two pieces of music connected seamlessly, and the tone of Xiao Yi's "yeah" gradually took a lighter turn, and he started singing a part of another song. 

The entire venue was in an uproar, and then they frantically applauded. 

"You know I can't smile without you——" 

Xiao Yi raised his eyebrows slightly, and sang to the three judges who still had their backs turned to him. Then, the second light turned on, and Pang Niu turned around. 

Immediately afterwards, Xiao Yi followed the change of music and switched songs again, smoothly connecting: "Send some love to me——!!!"

"Please! Keep you safe from harm!" Xiao Yi sang wantonly in high spirits. At that moment, the lights revolved, and the whole stage seemed to turn into his own special performance, and the tune became faster and faster. 

"To a better man——" 

Xiao Yi harvested his oats beautifully, and in the end, Ji Zi also turned around, leaving Qi Quan alone whose back was still facing the stage.

The entire place was brightly lit, the audience were applauding frantically, and the fans hired by the company were also madly cheering. 

"You're really handsome!" Pang Niu said, "I've never seen such a handsome contestant. Do you know that you're good-looking?" 

Xiao Yi smiled and said: "I don't know.... being handsome is actually not very useful." 

"How can it be useless?" Wang Jing said, "If you're handsome, you can ride horses, have people crushing on you secretly, have instant successes, how great is that?"

The audience laughed. Qi Quan said: "Aiya, Teacher Wang, you're too hateful hahaha....." 

Xiao Yi: "......."

Xiao Yi's face was full of black lines.😓

"Come introduce yourself." Ji Zi said, "Three judges lit their lights for you. Is this your first time competing?" 

"I participated in a competition five years ago." Xiao Yi said. 

"Oh——" The four judges seemed to be pondering. 

"Why didn't you continue on from there?" Wang Jing said, "You are very talented, you can seamlessly connect three English songs together, I've rarely seen singing like this." 

Pang Niu said: "Big Chicken Gu also sang in this style before, it's called skewers." 

Xiao Yi smiled: "Yes, skewers. I think, these are... the three stages of love. From the first to the second and then to the third, they are all about the three feelings of love."

"Oh——which three feelings?" Wang Jing asked.

Xiao Yi replied: "The attention and sadness caused by the period of ambiguity and ignorance, the suffering of gains and losses when falling in love, and the desperate effort and desire to respond."

The whole audience looked at Xiao Yi, and the four judges did not know what to say for a while. Wang Jing asked, "Is there someone you like? Did the person you like come today?"

"Cut." The director said, "Teacher Wang Jing, he came by himself today."

The filming was temporarily halted. The director over to have a discussion with the four judges. The makeup artist helped Xiao Yi to touch up. Xiao Yi smiled and said, "Thank you. Muah."

The makeup artist: "......"

"Muah muah." The makeup artist said with a smile.

Xiao Yi finally said this brainwashing word that he had been holding back for a long time out. He immediately felt relaxed, as if a person with obsessive-compulsive disorder that had finally gotten his wish. Turning back, the director said: "Let's start."

Qi Quan smiled, he pointed at Xiao Yi and said, "Do you know why I didn't turn around?"

The judges all laughed. Xiao Yi smiled, and said nothing.

"Your singing skills did not pass my requirement." Qi Quan said, "But you do have talent, and you're very innovative. I think you should try more lyrics, composition, and arrangement."

"You are right." Xiao Yi smiled, "I feel so too."

"I hope to see an even better performance from you next time." Ji Zi said, "Come on, let me give you this pin."

Xiao Yi stepped forward and hugged the four judges. Pang Niu smiled and said, "Handsome guy, do your best."

Xiao Yi gave her a kiss. Wearing the pin, he faced the stage and made a peace sign ✌️, and then exited. 

After his exit, everyone took a break. Ji Zi smiled and said to Wang Jing: "I don't know if his next song will still be ballad skewers next time. I quite wish to see what songs will appear."

Wang Jing said: "This is the first time I've heard skewers in a talent competition, the style was pretty good."

Xiao Yi went backstage and hugged the host The camera was pushed over, and Xiao Yi smiled and said to the camera, "I made it!"

Then, Xiao Yi returned to the dressing room and said to Jing Lu: "Let's go?"

Jing Lu said: "You sang so well."

Xiao Yi said: "Actually, it's quite average. Honestly, I will analyze for you when I go back. You will know which song you can sing best next time."

Xiao Yi returned to the company, took off the pin and threw it on the table. He slept for a while, then ordered takeaway for dinner. As he sat eating the takeaway, he began to choose the semi-final songs with Jing Lu.

After the semi-finals the competition would no longer be a concern to Xiao Yi. In the semi-finals, according to the result of the draw, he needed to sing a love song together with Jing Lu on stage. Finally, according to the prior arrangement, Xiao Yi was now anxiously waiting for the judges to vote him off stage. 

"What song shall we choose for the duet?" Xiao Yi asked.

"I have no opinion." Jing Lu said, "Teacher Xiao, you decide."

"Don't call me Teacher Xiao." Xiao Yi smiled and said, "The company has hired a vocal teacher for us. We will train together then, now I am your partner."

At this point in time, Jing Lu admired Xiao Yi so much. Xiao Yi glanced at him, and inadvertently felt that Jing Lu was a little strange.

Is he gay? Maybe a bit. Xiao Yi felt that Jing Lu was a bit introverted and didn't speak too much on stage. This was not very good. Xiao Yi kept encouraging him to make him more confident. However, he suddenly discovered that Jing Lu's tone of speaking with him was exactly how he was when he spoke to Lu Zhou.

"Let's talk about it in a few days." Xiao Yi said, "These few days, take a vacation first. Are you short of money? If you're short of money, I will ask about it with President Du."

Jing Lu was indeed short of money, but he did not know how to bring it up. The vocal teacher came and re-trained the two of them. Xiao Yi felt that Jing Lu might be a little poor and was not eating enough, so he asked Du Mei for approval to pay Jing Lu a salary first so he could use it as  living expenses. Du Mei said: "Your recording went very well today, you should pay attention to the next one."

Xiao Yi nodded. He knew that Du Mei was reminding him to not sing so well and boot Jing Lu off accidentally, but Xiao Yi knew that he could not. Although he sang very dazzlingly, in fact his singing skills and innate foundation were not good. On the contrary, Jing Lu’s voice was in good condition and quite satisfactory. In reality, it was very difficult to sing smoothly. He did not practice hard, but urged Jing Lu to keep up with his daily vocal music lessons.

Xiao Yi returned home, breathed a sigh of relief, and went to take a shower. After washing up, his flat mates, oo and xx, still sat side by side on the sofa watching TV. Xiao Yi thought Seriously, what did Dumei sign the two of them on for, and aimlessly letting them sit in a rental house to watch tv? 

"Teacher Xiao." oo greeted.

Xiao Yi took the initiative to say: "My performance went well today, I will treat you guys to dinner tomorrow."

After saying that, Xiao Yi went into his room. The sounds of the TV could be heard from the inside. Xiao Yi was lying on the bed and using his phone, posting a Weibo report to the fans: I participated in a talent competition today, and everything went well. Watch the TV next week everyone! 

He has just posted on Weibo, and that lfqlz009 sent another message.

lz009: Muah Xiao Ge, how was the competition?

Masochist Xiao Tzuki: You can watch it next week! Hope you like it! 

Xiao Yi almost wanted to put this person in his blacklist. He had finally forgot the muah nonsense, but now it came back again, so his entire being was tossed over and over again, as muah echoed all throughout his head. Xiao Yi got up almost frantically, sat on the bed, looked at this guy's profile page, and saw that he had left a message on his Weibo again.

Others said that they were looking forward to Xiao Yi's performance. This person said not to look forward to it too much. In fact, Xiao Yi could not sing well, anyways, just don't look forward to it too much.

Others said that Xiao Yi's singing was very good, but lfqlz009 humbly said where and when, his Yi actually had a broken voice——

Fuck was this person sick! Xiao Yi wanted to directly blacklist him, then he saw someone saying that Xiao Yi was talented, and lfqlz009 said that he was not talented, that they have not seen anyone truly talented, and that his lyrics were simply incomprehensible.

Xiao Yi began to understand why Lu Zhou had to register 20 side accounts to curse at people. So annoying. What the hell is this? Crazy! Is this person an anti or a fan? Others are praising me, why are you being humble! How is this any of your business!

Xiao Yi did not stop checking this person's account, and began to delve deeper.

Xiao Yi first clicked into this person's account, flipped through his Weibo for a long time, and found no clues. He even analyzed word by word. This person added a bunch of marketing accounts. It looked like he was a side account, and there was no profile picture. What is this person?!

And he had zero impression of when he had added this person to his alerts. Xiao Yi checked on that and saw that it was added recently. 

Xiao Yi: "......"

Xiao Yi started to feel a little ominous, and clicked into that person's Weibo. This guy forgot to hide his registered email address, so Xiao Yi copied that email address and searched it on Baidu.

Xiao Yi thought to himself I seem like a pervert. Why am I so focused on this sort of fan? This is not right, but let me be human for a little while. Anyways, a moral emperor like me would never do anything to others...

Nothing was found.

Xiao Yi deleted the last few digits of that registered email address and searched again. This time a lot of things were found, including some Weibo content. Xiao Yi searched Weibo again, he thought it was too abnormal, and that he should forget about it... Your mother! Are you teasing me?!

Xiao Yi went crazy.*[2]. 

In his frenzied search, there was a side account discovered, clearly and plainly replying under an anti's post about Lu Zhou: "You are wrong, my Zhou has never had any plastic surgery....."

That's not right! Isn't this me?! Xiao Yi searched for a long time, but ended up finding himself. His whole person felt as if he had been churned in a tornado. With his limited IQ, he could not solve this mystery, but after a full five minutes, he finally figured it out.

This is Lu Zhou's side account! That lfqlz009..... Were there any 008 007 as well?

Xiao Yi went to search again and found that except for 008, the others all existed.

Does Lu Zhou still own these side accounts?!! Ahhhhh! Xiao Yi went crazy again. -

Xiao Yi looked at that lfqlz009 and almost wanted to kneel down. He was wondering What abbreviation is this? Is it Lu Fa Cai*[3] Lu Zhou? But shouldn't Lu Fa Cai be lfc? What the hell is lfq! Did you misspell the pinyin when you registered?!

Xiao Yi tried to poke that lfqlz009.

Masochist Xiao Tzuki: Muah.

lz009: Muah. 

Xiao Yi: "......" 

Xiao Yi 's entire person felt not right. Lu Zhou's 'muah' expression appeared in his mind for an instant, and he was no longer able to think about why Lu Zhou used this side account to pretend to be cute and monitor himself. While lying in bed, he was about to laugh till he cramped.

"Ahahahahahaha." Xiao Yi laughed while hugging Lu Zhou's doll in his arms, "Muah muah, you are so cute, Zhou Ge!"

Xiao Yi wanted to ask him, Where are you, how could you bear to cast me aside like this, but if he exposed Lu Zhou, Lu Zhou would completely ignore his existence. This precious muah must be well protected, lest he got scared away. 

Masochist Xiao Tzuki: Are you male or female.

lz009: Male. 

Xiao Yi: Hahahahaha, what is going on here? Your Brother Xiao Yi is in a mess now after being played by you.

Masochist Xiao Tzuki: You're very cute you know that? 

lz009: I know. [♥️]

Xiao Yi: Hahahahahah, I can't keep this up anymore, help......

Masochist Xiao Tzuki: Where do you live. 

lz009: I'm going to sleep, Xiao Yi Ge, go to bed early and pay attention to your body. [💪]

Xiao Yi was about to cry. Is he gonna stop playing? Don't! Let's talk for a while more, I love you, muah......

Masochist Xiao Tzuki: Can you chat with me for a while? 

That Lu Zhou who had been doused with the wrong culture solution and mutated thoroughly, stopped talking. Xiao Yi thought Okay, it's almost one o'clock. Everyone will sleep well separately.

Xiao Yi's mind was entirely occupied by Lu Zhou's muah all night. He wanted to poke that Lu Fa Cai the next day, but he was afraid that it would be too obvious and Lu Zhou might notice something, so he had no choice but to ignore him.

PLEASE DO NOT UPLOAD ELSEWHERE. 
If you're reading this anywhere else, it has been stolen from https://daisyktranslations.blogspot.com/

Friday night, it was broadcasted. 

Xiao Yi was drinking beer and eating Zhou Hei Ya*[4] that his mother had mailed over, and  watched TV together with oo xx in passing.

"The strongest silkiest heart is the most beautiful feeling! This show is specially brought to you by the Giant Black Shampoo. After washing with the Giant Black Shampoo, it will make your hair look like black ash, chemical fertilizer for your hair, become black ash, chemical fertilizer for your hair......." 

Xiao Yi spitted out the beer in an instant.

"The four judges, please——!" The host shouted after reading that tongue twister.

The four judges turned around. 

Xiao Yi received a call from Jing Lu and said with a smile: "Well, I'm watching it, not bad."

When Jing Lu stood on the stage, he seemed to turn into a different person. oo xx looked at him jealously, their inner monologue was so loud that Xiao Yi could even hear everything.

Why was he the one to be supported! 

Xiao Yi smiled and watched Jing Lu singing on TV. Xiao Yi chose one of Xu Ruyun's song for him. Jing Lu sang in an everchanging voice, sometimes it was low and sometimes it was floaty. Once he was on the stage, it seemed as if the whole stage belonged to him. This kind of feeling was something every successful artist would have - just like when Lu Zhou started shooting, the filming set became his world, and once Jing Lu was cleaned up, the stage would become his turf.

My game, my turf, my rules.

Jing Lu did not show off his skills. Perhaps the song itself already showed off his skills from the beginning to end. He sang very well, and Xiao Yi could only think that Jing Lu should be promoted, and that he himself giving way was what he should do.

When it was Xiao Yi's turn to go on stage, Xiao Yi himself almost choked to death on the duck neck.

Why is it so cringey! It was the first time that Xiao Yi saw himself on TV. He was literally going to fly out of the solar system from the amount of cringe he felt. His expression and actions were all wrong, and he seemed narcissistic. Cringe him to death!

Xiao Yi hated that he could not throw the TV down the building. But the show had already been broadcasted, and his image...... could no longer be saved.

"Teacher Xiao Yi, you sing so well!" oo xx said unanimously.

xx said: "Very photogenic, you look much better on camera than in real life!"

oo: "So handsome! Teacher Xiao Yi, look, you're popular!"

oo checked Weibo, today's show was not over yet, but news on Xiao Yi were already frantically filling the screen. Xiao Yi burst into tears and said, "Let me have some silence..."

Xiao Yi finally understood why Lu Zhou did not like to watch his own shows. It must be because he felt too awkward. Watching his own self, no matter how long he watched, he still felt awkward. Xiao Yi went into his room in tears and locked the door behind him. He grabbed the Lu Zhou doll, thrashed around on the bed, and howled: "How will I live in the future!"

That night, phone calls came one after another.

"You became popular." Duma said, "When did you join a talent competition? Why didn't you tell me?"

Xiao Yi: "You've watched it too? I don't wanna live anymore."

"Your performance's very good!" Duma said, "It's too good!"

Xiao Yi: "Don't comfort me."

Dumas said: "Wait for the next time, I will definitely come to support you!"

Xiao Yi: "What support! There's no next time!"

The coordinator of the first crew he had joined also called.

"You're popular——!" The coordinator said, "The show hasn't even ended yet! Someone has already created a post specifically for you!"

Xiao Yi was cry without tears: "Oh."

"You must give tickets next time!" Sister An said.

Throughout the evening, the countless crews that Xiao Yi had tagged along, including Ning Yaqing and Qi Ai, all called him. There were a bunch of articles in the WeChat circle, and his Weibo fans instantly rose to 500,000.

Xiao Yi was almost scared to the point of peeing himself. He gave Du Mei a call. Du Mei said: "No problem, don't be nervous."

Alright. 

Xiao Yi was very happy to see that so many fans liked him. He swiped his cell phone until 1am at night.

lz009: Xiao Yi Ge, you performed well today.

Masochist Xiao Tzuki: Thank you! You're not going to sleep yet?

lz009: I won't talk to you anymore, my mother asked me to do my homework. Muah, do your best!

Xiao Yi: "......"

Xiao Yi almost dropped his phone and thought What stupid homework are you doing! What kind of student are you pretending to be at this age! 

The next day, the news of Xiao Yi circulated like crazy. His fans soared to more than one million in a flash Some people cut off the scene of Xiao Yi singing, and said that he was 360 degrees without blind spots, and that he was simply a beauty.

Xiao Yi burst into tears, he thought he was like joining in the fun. While he was cringed to the point of turning into Buddha, he could not help but to click into the pictures to look. Others even created a cp of him with that Kuang Yan whom he had fought with, saying that there were flirting glances between them. Xiao Yi's world completely collapsed.

Following that, there were gossips emerging on Tianya. The Xiao Yi who became popular because of the talent competition yesterday, was the same Xiao Yi who was fought for by Lu Zhou and Li Changzheng, before being successfully snatched away by Lu Zhou.

As a result, countless past events were dug out, including the time where Lu Zhou had chased after Xiao Yi for a long way. Finally some fans said that he had a girlfriend! Then they uploaded an old song that Xiao Yi had sung to his girlfriend, a traditional song that was recorded in the past. All kinds of messy black history of his were completely dug out.

Then there was a melee. It was said that Xiao Yi was gay and was a love swindler who cheated both marriage and feelings. Xiao Yi thought Although I am gay now, I wasn't gay before. Who would swindle the marriage party so patiently for five years and still not be married! This liar is too professional!

Next, Lu Zhou's fans combined with Xiao Yi's own fans and began to attack Xiao Yi's antis.

Xiao Yi's antis seemed to be running out of ideas. They started to criticize that his nostrils were large, his face was crooked, had ugly teeth, triangular eyes, and weird protruding ears. Xiao Yi almost suspected that the person they were describing was a monster from the Lord of the Rings. Then they began to attack his fans, claiming that they falsified Xiao Yi's height on Baidu Encyclopedia, and that he looked at most 1.65 meters tall.

Xiao Yi thought to himself Where did this 1.65 meters come from, you bunch of antis, what is "visual inspection", "maximum", "1.65 meters", and he seemed taller because of visual error... Are all of  your eyes vernier calipers?! 

Some people started to pick on Xiao Yi's pronunciation, saying that it was inaccurate, and even dragged out the "not all" pronunciation of the leader of the judges. So the leading judge's fans fought with Xiao Yi's antis. Xiao Yi's fans, Lu Zhou's fans, and Li Changzheng's fans all lumped into one, and along with the leading judge's fans and others, they launched their counterattacks endless times. Finally, when Zhang Xinran, Ning Yaqing and Wu Henggu were dragged in together as well, Xiao Yi gave up on the situation. 

Xiao Yi was dizzy from looking at the discords and felt like he was on his last breath. He thought that this was not for suitable for human consumption, and he felt like he had been run over by countless elephants the following day. He had to close Weibo and stop looking. 

"Do you want me to hire an assistant for you?" Dumei did not expect Xiao Yi to be so popular after recording the show.

"Don't." Xiao Yi said, "I don't want to play anymore...... I will leave after the next song."

Du Mei said: "We didn't expect you to explode so suddenly."

Xiao Yi thought Do you think I am a balloon? What do you mean by suddenly explode!

Lin Yao was still looking at the evaluations on the Internet, and said: "The accumulation of long-term topicality caused yesterday's outbreak. We suppressed all the topics about you before. Xiao Yi, won't you consider developing in the company?"

"No." Xiao Yi shook his head.

"It's a pity," Lin Yao said.

Du Mei said: "To terminate the contract, remove one of your legs."

Xiao Yi's face turned green in an instant.

Du Mei smiled and said: "Just kidding, I would rather you stay in the company and help them create music."

Xiao Yi: "......"

Xiao Yi thought for a while and said, "If there're chances in the future, I am willing, that..... President Du, are you not angry?"

"It's not as serious as you think." Dumei said, "The entertainment circle is not a triad, where would you find so much fighting and killing...... If you are willing, stay, if you don't want to stay, leave. I even let Lu Zhou leave. Why would I trouble you?"

Xiao Yi feel very sorry towards Dumei. Although the company could not say that it had spent a lot of resources to support him, at least during his time in the company, Dumei has always been polite to him. Maybe it was because of Duma, or maybe because she really liked Xiao Yi.

"Go back and prepare well." Lin Yao said, "Let's discuss how you and Jing Lu's pk can go smoothly so it doesn't appear to be too deliberate."

"No problem." Xiao Yi said, "I will definitely obey your commands, and won't mess around on stage."

A week later, Xiao Yi first went to the program group to record a video. This video was to be used after he was eliminated. Xiao Yi carefully finished recording the video and returned to the company to have a discussion with Jing Lu.

Coincidentally, Wu Henggu came in looking for someone. He saw Xiao Yi, smiled, then said, "Brother Xiao Yi!"

"Hey! Hello hello!" With a smile, Xiao Yi hurriedly said. 

Wu Henggu said: "You sang so well!"

Xiao Yi smiled and said, "Randomly singing." He was thinking Your amnesia is cured? Let's play happily together after I am eliminated.

Wu Henggu said a few perfunctory words and left.

Jing Lu asked: "Teacher Xiao, what do you want to do after you have been eliminated?"

"Compose songs for all of you." Xiao Yi said with a smile.

Jing Lu said: "Can you be my agent?"

Xiao Yi said: "I can't. The company will send you a better agent, listen to me, as long as you sing seriously, the company will not treat you badly. President Du and President Lin, they are pretty nice. "

Jing Lu didn't speak and flipped the music sheets in his hand. Xiao Yi was silent for a moment, and then with a smile he said to Jing Lu: "Do you know? Luzhou told me that the entertainment industry is just like a triad. Fierce fighting, fast grace and quick revenge, exhausting your mind and schemes, flattering those higher than you and bullying those who are lower.  The world changes, and there are always ups and downs." 

Jing Lu made a sound of acknowledgement and looked at Xiao Yi.

"But there are also many people who are loyal." Xiao Yi said, "Not everyone steps on other people, and not everyone is motivated by money, so don't worry, just be yourself. There are always some people who are willing to make friends. If you are a friend, there will always be some people who will be willing to give you a hand without repayment. If you end up not finding anyone like this, then just be yourself and don’t lose your way."

Jing Lu nodded. Xiao Yi said: "Let's practice this song, and try to sing this classic song to give a different feeling."

During the semi-finals in June, Xiao Yi would poke that 'muah' every day. However, 'muah' stopped replying after a few days. Xiao Yi was a little disappointed, but completing the current task was the most important thing. 

The weather in Beijing was gradually getting hot. Xiao Yi was lying on the balcony of the rental apartment. The weather had been great these few days, and he quietly looked at the night sky.

The constellations seemed to transform into Lu Zhou's figure, and in the vast night sky, it said to him:

"Muah."

Xiao Yi: "......"

____________________________________________________________________________________

Personal thoughts:

Xiao Yi has discovered his cute little fan Lu muah muah  ¬‿¬

The moment we have all been waiting for is coming soon! (I think) 

*Btw, I will be switching from Ge to Brother, so it is less confusing for readers with stm hahaha :P

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Notes:

1. The lyrics of the song sang by Xiao Yi were actually originally in English, but did not make any sense, so I did a little tweaking. 

2. 萧毅整个人都斯巴达了, which means Xiao Yi's entire person became a Spartan. This is the actual sentence, and is a China slang used to describe a person is going crazy, or is crazy. Hence I substituted with a simpler sentence - Xiao Yi went crazy. 

3. Lu Fa Cai means Lu Fortune, or Fortune Lu. This is Luzhou's nickname among his friends. 

4. Zhou Hei Ya is a popular China braised duck chain store known for spicy duck necks. In literal meaning, it is Black Duck Zhou. 

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